Bratty Girl

So, do I believe in soul mates? Yes. Absolutely.

Here’s how I define soulmate: That one person who completes you, body and soul. The one who fills your thoughts from the moment you awaken to the moment you drift into the bliss of unconsciousness. The one who, even in the bliss of unconsciousness, fills your mind to the brink with thoughts of love, understanding, strength, and desire. Your other half; the ebb to your flow. The moon that pulls your tide back to shore when you begin to slip away and allows you to drift back to sea when the shore becomes too much to bear. The wind that fills your sails when you find yourself adrift upon rough waters with no way to safety. The understanding that not only forgives and understands your brokenness, but feels grief at the fact that they were not present to prevent such trials and tribulations. The love that knows no limits, no boundaries, no expectations, and no forfeit.

Do I think there is more than one soulmate? Perhaps. I believe that every person we love leaves an imprint on our heart. I have no doubt that we are designed to love and love again. It’s a process. Every time we give the gift of our love and ourselves to another person, they become a link in the chain of life and love. They enable us to be better lovers, more compassionate friends, more understanding partners, and more fulfilling other halves. Each of these people is, in a small way, our soul mate. However, I believe that everyone is intended for one other person. Who that person is, while not predetermined, is very limited in possibility. We are designed to be compatible with a very select number of people. These people, maybe a dozen in number, are spread all over the map, and finding that ONE is what drives us to love over and over again. But knowing that there IS that One, that’s what makes the loving worth while.

Now, let me make myself perfectly clear, I’m not one for lying or for telling people it’s OK to lie. Having said that, telling a little “white lie” every once in a while might actually be healthy when it comes to managing our interpersonal relationships. I clearly don’t need to go into all of the reasons why telling the truth is important. One of the fundamental foundations for our relationships depends on our ability to rely and trust those who are most dear and close to our hearts. So, now that I got that out of the way, I can talk about some of the reasons or exceptions to why telling the whole truth and nothing but the truth, might actually not apply. Here are four instances when it’s OK to tell a little white lie:

1. When the whole truth tears someone down and makes them feel horrible about themselves rather than builds them up, like saying “I like your new, extremely short haircut” when in reality it’s just awful. Brutal honesty can be used as a toxic weapon. We are not obligated to tell the whole truth if it hurts someone’s feelings.

2. A little white lie like mentioning the tooth fairy or Santa Claus is acceptable when it protects a child’s innocence or creative imagination. How can you argue with that one?

3. Offering passing pleasantries, like “Oh … it’s no trouble at all” or “I’m fine, thanks for asking,” counts as OK in my book, too.

4. Complimenting someone, but perhaps taking it a little too far, like saying “Your cookies are the best I’ve ever had," is also acceptable. Mild false truths make it easier for people to get along and are primarily harmless in most cases.